Is this why moms always look so frazzled?

This post is going to be a little disjointed, because that's how I feel. Now that Ben is 9 months, we've entered into a new phase of parenting. I remember when he was just a few months old thinking that it would be really hard once I had to start setting limits and making rules. I always thought I would be a really strict mom. I would always see people with their bratty kids at the grocery store or Target, and think that's not gonna be me! Now, I don't really need to worry about that yet, but I'm starting to realize it's a lot easier to talk about setting limits than to actually do it. 

Like all babies, Ben really likes to get into EVERYTHING. Some of it is ok, and some of it isn't, but how do you decide that? I mean, he really likes to rip up paper. So recently I've found myself letting him rip up random catalogs that I don't care about, but deterring him when he tries it with magazines or books. Of course that's probably not correct. Because he doesn't know the difference between those he needs to know he can't rip up anything, or else I just need to move them all out of the way. This is what I mean. I'm afraid I'm just going to be one of those moms that calmly looks on while their child destroys things. How did I get this way? How do you decide what battles to fight? I'm tired all the time, and that contributes to me just shrugging my shoulders and letting it go. He's also started biting all the time. He bites Joel and I on our necks or shoulders, or he crawls to my leg and chomps on it. I know it's just teething, but am I supposed to say, oh he's just teething, or am I supposed to say "no" and then redirect his attention?

 My brain feels so scattered. I leave Ben in the living room to play while I get laundry from the bedroom or something, and when I come back he's crying because he fell, or he's messing with something he shouldn't. But if I stay and play with him all the time, I feel guilty about not getting things done around the house. I can't take him with me everywhere! Maybe I should, though. Is that the secret? It gets old constantly re-directing his attention from the fireplace, or books, or the tv, or electrical cords, or the hot oven. Every time I break from what I'm doing to take care of him, I lose track of everything. My days just usually end up flying by in a haze of wondering around aimlessly and starting a million projects I can't finish. I miss my ADD medication, but I can't take it because I'm still nursing. I haven't felt this bad since elementary school. I remember going into my sixth grade classroom thinking "I WILL pay attention today. I WILL NOT look out the window. I'll try REALLY REALLY hard and listen to everything the teacher says." And I would try. I would clench my teeth and stare straight ahead. And then an hour would go by and I would suddenly wake up and realize I hadn't heard anything. And I would be so frustrated and feel like crying, and think, "why am I so dumb?" The past couple of weeks have been just like that. I get to the end of the day and think, "what happened? what is the matter with me?" I realize I sound really selfish and whiny as I write this. I don't know....I guess this is the part of parenting you can't learn from a book. Sometimes I miss the days where all I had to think about was eating and sleeping and changing diapers. 

First Snow

Yep. He's definitely more of a beach type of guy.

The one moment of calm

Owen wonders why Ben is acting so crazy

Skeptical

Sick of the whooooole thing!

More 9 month photos

We're having another long day. I think Mr. B. is teething, so nap time is not going too well. He's EXHAUSTED but has only slept for about 30 minutes today so far. Of course, he just wants to be held all day, and I want to get some work done. If I put him down he has a fit, and if I pick him up he fusses. Because he's sleepy!! Why am I the only one who realizes that? *sigh*

As promised, here are some more pictures from this month. I cheated because the last two are from this morning. They were too cute not to post!

Benjamin and mama in the back yard

Trying to figure out how to sit down without falling!

Playing at Owen's house. He was SUPER excited about this toy, and would "dance" every time it played music.

This morning on our walk. How precious is this? He was looking at Joel. Daddy has become Benjamin's best friend.

Helping me unload the dishwasher

9 months

Whew! I just finally put Benjamin down for a nap. He started one this morning, but woke up too early due to his loud mama. I'm paying for my mistake, believe me! 

Hmmmm....what has Mr. B. learned this month? The past 2 weeks have been pretty big. When we visited home, Ben had started pulling himself up and cruising a little bit, but now there's no stopping him! He pulls himself up on everything and has had a few spills. One caused a little blood, and another left a smallish goose egg. (And yes, we watch him.) At this point, all we can do is try to remove dangerous items and all obstacles, and then get out of the way. We received some wonderful new toys for Christmas, but unfortunately Ben is not as interested in them as I would like. I think his thoughts go something like this:

 "These toys are nice. Blocks. Hmmm...baby doll....more bl...WHAT!!!!! Someone left a REMOTE CONTROL right here on this TABLE!!!!! Let me see if I can get to it....hmmmm.....WHAT THE!!!!! Did you know that if you MOVE this BOX and scoot under this BENCH, and then MOVE this OTHER box, and then MOVE some more stuff, there are CORDS!!!!! Just RIGHT HERE out in the OPEN!!!! My toys are AWESOME!!!!!"

So,  you get an idea of what our lives are like right now. No actual crawling yet, but Ben will crawl about 4-5 steps and then drop down to his tummy and army crawl. He's getting pretty fast at it, and will drag himself across a room in a flash. Today I saw him stick one of his arms inside his shirt sleeve for some reason, and then drag himself across the kitchen floor with the other arm like he was in a war movie. It was very dramatic. The other day I left him in our little den for about 5 minutes, TOPS, and I heard him making these frantic noises. He always says, "ee-ah, ee-ah" when he's pretty excited about something. He started to get louder so I ran across the house and had to laugh when I saw him. We have a television antenna we aren't using, but had left on top of the tv table. Benjamin had somehow dragged this huge object ( bigger than him) across the room with him, and then tried to pull himself up on the laundry basket. When I got there he was sprawled on the floor holding onto the antenna with a pile of clothes and the clothes basket on top of him. Another comical thing about Ben being able to pull himself up is that can't quite figure out how to put himself down. Most of the time he just falls, and that takes care of it. But sometime I'll glance over and he's holding onto something and looking at me with panic as his legs s-l-o-w-l-y start to spread apart into the splits. I guess he'll figure it out at some point. 

Below are a few pictures from this month. Blogger only lets me post 5 pictures at a time, but I have more I'll post tomorrow.

Ben and his best friend Owen. Don't they look mischievous?

Benjamin had such a great time playing our piano the other night. 

The oven is Mr. B.'s favorite object to pull himself up on. He gets the added bonus of seeing his reflection in the window!

I took this a few weeks ago. He had discovered the swiffer and was doing a little dance. Now it's one his obsessions.

This is his other favorite place in the house. I've since put his measuring cups and other "toys" in the bottom drawer. He usually goes straight for this spot whenever he's in the kitchen.

Ben and the Box

Benjamin was VERY excited about the arrival of this diaper box, and immediately pulled himself up.

He realizes it's the perfect size!

Play play play....

"Wait, how do I get down from here? I haven't learned that yet!"

"This isn't what I had in mind!"

"Maybe this baby will be my friend."

Boomer Sooner!

I just took Ben to Costco in his outfit and we saw a man wearing his Florida gear. Grrrr...they MIGHT win, but Mr. B. still wins the cute contest!

We're back...

...and ready to start the new year. We arrived here on Friday, and on Saturday Joel tilled up a spot in the back yard for the vegetable garden. Yesterday he started his seeds. Joel is really on fire with home projects. Last night he told me he's starting work on the porch this weekend. I said you mean like tiling the floor?! And painting?! Yep, he said. Okay then! Now that recycling station/gardening center/dog headquarters/shoe and coat depository/room with the 20 year old outdoor carpet is actually going to be a sun porch! Does this mean I have to find a spot for all that junk that's been accumulating over the past 2 years?

Sunday night Mr. B and I had a rough time. He woke up at 12:30 to nurse, but was very restless and didn't want to go back to sleep. After a couple of missteps I realized his teeth hurt, and gave him teething tablets. Nothing. Then I tried Oragel. Again....no change. Fast forward to 2:30 AM and me holding a screaming baby having a massive teething attack. He didn't want to nurse, which pretty much meant I was at a loss. Joel walked in a some point and told me to go to bed and he would take care of things. We quickly realized that wasn't going to work. Finally, around 3:30 I remembered I could give Ben some Tylenol (hey, your brain moves slow in the middle of the night!) and that seemed to calm him down enough to sleep. The teething continued all day Monday, and he still doesn't have any new teeth yet!

The following pictures are from our trip to Oklahoma. We had such a great visit with family and friends, and Benjamin LOVED all the attention. His aunts taught him how to kiss and now you can't even say the word or make a *smooch* sound without Mr. B. leaning in for a smackaroo! He also perfected pulling himself up, so now no object safe. Unfortunately, he really wants to practice his pulling up skill on Ladybird and we all know that's not a good idea.

Gotta go....Ben just pulled our phone off the table and is working his way towards the computer cords.....